Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Squirrels, Moss, and Sticks.

Okay, you see this? Do you know what this is? It's called a squirrel.

Do you know what squirrels are? Squirrels are evil. They're almost as evil as cats! One day, I'm going to catch one and teach it a lesson it will never forget!

There are a number of reasons why squirrels are evil...

1. They chatter insults down at us from their trees. And when we dogs bark back up at them, they chatter more insults back down at us.

2. Every time my humans plant a garden, the squirrels eat the plants before they grow! It makes my humans angry. (Mind you, if the squirrels didn't eat the plants, I probably would instead...)

3. Squirrels have a way of making us dogs really angry. They let us chase them, but they always stay just out of reach. And then they climb up a tree, and start laughing and chattering insults back down at us, which leads us to reason number one again of why squirrels are evil.

Now guess what the squirrels are doing? They're throwing moss at me! We have this huge Maple tree covering our whole front yard, and the squirrels go up and peel off the moss and throw clumps of it down on the ground. They're either searching for bugs under the moss, or else they're trying to kill me by throwing the moss down at me! Okay, moss doesn't actually hurt that much when it falls, but it still angers me to see the squirrels doing this. There also seems to be a bunch of sticks on the ground, which my humans say fell out of the tree during windstorms, but I say the squirrels threw them down, too!

Look at this stick I found on the ground. It's huge!

Maybe by chewing up this big stick, the squirrels will get the message of what I'll do to them once I catch them!

Mmmm, tasty stick!


Ferndoggle said...

My #1 reason squirrels are evil...they won't let me catch them!! I've been trying for years.

Care with that stick, little dude. It's as big as you!


happy said...

Ooh the squirrels sure are evil. Their chatters sure sound real annoying.

Whoa, that's a big stick you've got there Sparky!

Lola Smiles said...

:) Yo Sparky! I don't mean to brag but I have caught a squirrel here & there. Drives my mom totally nuts! The secret is to have lots of snow on the ground. They can't run as fast! ;0

I dislike them big time. My mom thinks they're cute though! Whatever!

oh, btw, she wanted me to tell you she has 2 CANON cameras, a Rebel XTI and a little point & shoot camera!

luv ya,
Lola Smiles

Mr. T-Bone Beasley said...


Thanks for stopping by to say hi! Okay man, I've never seen a squirrel with my own nose yet, but now that I know what they look like, I will keep my nostrils open and my eyes peeled! If I ever see one of those here in the desert I will hunt it down, then send it to you to dipose of in any manner that you see fit. Perhaps you could take care of it infront of the other squirrels so they see that you mean business, and that you aren't one to fool around with!


Chase on my friend! Chase on!


Mr. T-Bone Beasley

Deefor said...

The squirrels in Denver like to tease me. And my mom won't let me eat their peanuts. Hope you catch one. Give it a chew for me.


MelínSole said...

is it heavy the stick?? haha

thanks for your comment!
i will add you to my links! =)

Cony & Melín

Lorenza said...

Hi, Sparky!
I've never seen a squirrel but I've heard they are evil!
Sure you have there a big stick!
Kisses and hugs

PKPWV said...

Yeah Sparky is back and you have a cool fun stick!!!


Super Boy & Baby-Licious said...

That stick id really HUGE! You got a strong jaw.

We enjoyed looking at the photos of you with different hairstyles in your previous post.

Boy n Baby

Huskee Boy said...

Hi Sparky,
That is one big stick!! I have not seen any squirrels before but they sure look evil!

Girl Girl Hamster said...

Woh those squirrels better watch out for you with that huge stick..

~ Girl girl

Simba said...

Maybe you can use the stick to knock the squirrels out of the trees.

Simba xx

Hammer said...

Hi Sparky
We have possums where we live rather than squirrels and they are not evil tho I think they might scratch if they were frightened. The possums usually only come out at night when I'm inside.
Hopefully the squirrels will get your meaning when you chew the sticks they throw down.
Hope you and Lizzie have a lovely time together over Easter. We will be thinking of you.
Love from Hammer

Fred said...

I likes to chase squirrels in my sleep! heehee (And by the way, I like your new haircut.)

Ginger said...

Hi Sparky!

Oh yes, I know all about the evilness of squirrels, especially the part about them laughing & chattering! I have to admit though that it's fun to watch my mom chatter right back at them, hands on her hips, making a clicking noise with her tongue. The squirrels don't understand her and the neighbors laugh at her. Those squirrels are slowly driving my mom insane!

Nubbin wags

Pee ess: LOVE the hair do's in your previous post!!!

Asta said...

That stick is amazing!!! Looks like loads of fun..I'm sowwy the squiwwels awe being so wude to you..that is evil thwowing stuff...not nice at all
smoochie kisses,

Amber-Mae said...

I hope the squirrels were watching you demonstrating on that stick dummy, heeheehee!

Love licks,
Solid Gold Dancer

Jessie and Jake said...

We try and try too to catch the evil Squirrels but they are soo fast. They once called Jake a fatty when he couldn't climb the tree.

they are sooo evil!

Gus and Louie said...

That sure is a big stick. We also think if you chew it up they will think twice...

Big Sloppy Kisses
Gus and Louie

Opy - the Original GruffPuppy said...

Hey buddy,

You have been nominated for Post of the Month over at the Bone Zone - head on over and cast your vote.


Noah the Airedale said...

Hmmm we don't have squirrels here Sparky but we have something just as annoying....Possums. I've gotten a few too. If you need any tips don't hesitate to ask matie.

Hugs and tail wags

Scooby & Charlie said...

Squirrels are evil I know because they love the tree in our front yard we walk out the front door and ther bomb us with acorns, something has to be done about them
well My mom is getting smarter she has been sneaky about my meds i was fineing them but now i cant fine them she sits there and laughs at me

well talk to later

Crikit, Sparky & Ginger said...

Hi Sparky! so that's how the moss clumps get all over our front yard! we got out front every morning to say goodbye to daddy and the moss is everywhere. Golly we've never seen a squirrel before then today mommy stopped fur us to look at one crossin the street but Ginger hogged the window. but we take your bark fur it and we keep watch whenever we get to go out front.

Hey glad you're back. We know about freaky acting computee cos we've been having all kinds of troubles that jus won't go away.

Happy Easter incase mommy doesn't let us blog cos they got some project to work on before Tucson road trip. The only fun we might have is when we meet coco puff so if ya wanna come we'll pick you up buddy and we can bark our pawrents ears off lol

Love Licks & waggin TX tails

pee ess love the big sticks woohoo

Pacco de Mongrel said...

i hate squirrel too... there are tons of them around my garden...

Charlie said...

Wow, I wouldn't want to be a squirrel around you!
- Charlie

Bella said...

yup yup yup - I can sooooo relate - we don't have skwirels, but possums and they are soooo evil tooo - ooow what I wanna do to them ....

Charlie dog said...

Hi Sparky

Please don't say squirrels too loudly 'cos my friend Flo with go barktastic bannanas!!!!

She hates them with a passion that is awesome to behold, I don't think she's ever caught one but if she did it would be definitely be squirrel burger all round.

Have a good weekend.

Charlie Boy

P.S. no more aliens to report.

Amber said...

Hey Sparky, I'm sure the squirrel are hard to catch. I saw them once, and they disappeared in seconds. That stick can be helpful, you know to catch some squirrels..
happy easter!!

Mary-Margaret O'Brien said...

Dog oh dog! I sure missed you. Glad to see you back again. Your humans sure have a nice green lawn. You must live someplace back East.

Love, Mary-Margaret

PS - I pretty much get along with squirrels, ground hogs and chipmunks, but I just stay away from discussing things like pawlitics and religion. I think they're pretty much agnostic, and definitly probably more "Green Peace" party than Republican.


Hey Sparky, have you been over to Ivy's blog? It's called "Squirrels are Evil". Maybe you need to report your evil squirrel to Ivy at

Woofs Casper and Pals

Maya and Kena said...

Hey Sparky!!
You are totally right!! Squirrels are EVIL!! Just the other day, we were on our walk and one squirrel ran across the street, and we went crazy. Our humans wouldn't let us off the leash and so we couldn't get it, and it was throwing insults at us, like you said!! Ugghhh... squirrels are mean little buggers!
Wags and licks,
Maya and Kena

Ashley said...

Max LOVES to chase the squirrels! He has never been able to catch one though. Best of luck!

Sorry we haven't written in a while. Max has been under the weather.